you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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