So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
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