I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
