So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
