i jhust puked up my retainher.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
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so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
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I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch