People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Randomize