The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
i dont even know how to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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