It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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