I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
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