I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?