before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
