oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Oh. My. God. It is NOT okay to drink Johnny Walker when there is no Jameson. My skull is eating my brain.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
