Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
