things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
Come see our sink grown plant.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
