So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I am available for nakedness
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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