My first STD was from a foam party
another moral hangover. fuck.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
