I can tuck mytits in my pants
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.