my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
These 27 C*ck Blocks Are Savage AF
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?