So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
