Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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