it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize