Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
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