She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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