At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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