I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
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He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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