I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
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I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
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I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.