first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
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