I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Randomize