I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
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