So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize