i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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