last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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