Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I think i got beer on your cat.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
