It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
