He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You ate ashes out of my bong
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