god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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