bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize