Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
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