There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize