So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
Randomize