um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
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