My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
