My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
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