Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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