I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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