I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize