So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every concussion has its silver lining
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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