I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I'm so fucking centered right now
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents