Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
