I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know